Anyone Can Write Badly!

Even me. Hell, especially me. I’m working on my pirate novel and came across this sentence. Keep in mind, I’m on the fourth draft. I should have found this eons ago:

I moved my spyglass off to the right and there was an open space in the harbor. Dark water with the harbor lights reflecting down in it. Huge iron rings in the stone harbor wall for ships to tie up to.

Hey, how many times can I use “harbor” in two sentences!? Duuuh.

How about this way:

I moved my spyglass off to the right and there was an open space in the harbor. Dark water with lights reflecting down in it. Huge iron rings in the stone wall for ships to tie up to.

Hey, better! If I can find mistakes in my stuff, you can find mistakes in yours. They’re there. Just look.

Plus, if you’ve read any of my blog or book, you’ll know I loathe character names that rhyme. There is some inner muscle-twitch thing that we writers have that compels us to have names that start with the same letter, have the same number of letters, or RHYME. You tell this to someone who does not read a lot of scripts, they’ll laugh at you.

Keep in mind, I’ve been writing for twenty years. For money.

In my pirate book, so far, I have these names: Timmy, Jimmy, Rodney, Jeffrey, Lanie, Archie… Well, I HAD those names. Now, they’re Walter, Clayton, Tim, Jeffrey, Angela, and Dave.

They DON’T FUCKIN’ RHYME ANY MORE!

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